


Proud Of Who We Are

by whom_ping_willow



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexual Peter Pettigrew, Bisexual Character, Bisexual James Potter, Bisexual Remus Lupin, Coming Out, Gay Character, Gay Pride, Gay Sirius Black, Hogwarts, M/M, Marauders, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Pride, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-05
Updated: 2019-08-13
Packaged: 2020-04-08 07:04:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19102120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whom_ping_willow/pseuds/whom_ping_willow
Summary: In this story, specifically written in celebration of Pride Month, each of the Marauders figure out who they are and learn to celebrate themselves and others.





	1. Sirius: No More Hiding

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone, happy Pride! And if you're reading this once Pride Month is over, happy [insert time of the year]!  
> Pride Month is a really important time of the year of me, and I know that applies to a lot of other people. So I hope you'll enjoy this fic, whether you relate to the things the characters go through or you just enjoy Wolfstar and the Marauders (or both, of course).

Sirius tapped his fingers anxiously at his bedpost, waiting for his friends to return to the dorm. They were still at dinner, but it probably wouldn’t be long before they came.

In a way, Sirius wished they would never return: that they would just stay away, so he wouldn’t have to tell them. But at the same time, it didn’t feel like he could keep this in any longer. 

For a while now, he had been hiding part of himself from them, from his closest friends. But it just felt so stupid, so pointless, to hide it away. Even though he was scared, absolutely terrified of what their reaction would be, he had to get it out. 

The door to the boys’ dormitory opened and Sirius’s heart skipped a beat as his friends all entered. 

“There you are, mate!” James Potter grinned, sitting down at the edge of his bed. “What did you wanna tell us?”

Sirius bit his lip, looking up at his friends. “Right,” he muttered. “I, uh, I wanted to tell you something…” He swallowed, his heart beating incredibly fast. Why was he suddenly so scared?

“Well, then tell us,” James urged him. “We’re waiting, Sirius.”

Sirius took a deep breath, opening his mouth to say the words he had been holding in for so long. “I’m…”

Suddenly, this felt like a horrible idea. Sirius balled his hands into fists to stop them from shaking. What if his friends wouldn’t accept him? What if they turned their backs on him, or even worse, told everyone? He’d have no one, then. 

“Nevermind,” he muttered, getting up and quickly running out of the door. He heard his friends call his name behind him, but he didn’t stop: just continued down the long staircase and out through the portrait of the fat lady. 

No, he couldn’t tell them: he could never tell anyone. 

 

-

 

Sirius felt so stupid for crying over such an idiotic thing, yet here he was: hiding inside the secret passage behind the one-eyed witch, crying his eyes out.  

Why was he always the one who was different? The only Gryffindor in a family of Slytherins, always the family disappointment. But never had he thought he was so different from his friends too. And just because of who he loved… It was ridiculous, really, that such a thing had to matter so much.

“Sirius?”

Sirius jumped, startled as the statue moved, opening up the entrance to the secret passage, to reveal Remus standing outside.

Swearing under his breath, Sirius looked away, quickly wiping his eyes as Remus squeezed through the narrow entry and sat down beside him. 

“How did you find me?” Sirius asked, looking at Remus once he was almost certain there were no traces of tears left on his face.

Remus smiled sympathetically, showing Sirius a piece of parchment. The Marauders' map, of course.

“Why did you run off like that?” Remus asked, his beautiful green eyes boring into Sirius.

Sirius shrugged, averting his eyes to the dull stone wall. “I dunno,” he muttered, a blatant lie, but much better than the truth: that he was scared. 

Remus sighed, gently placing his hand on Sirius’s shoulder. The simple touch made Sirius tense up, and even though it felt _so_ nice, he wanted to move away. “Sirius, you know you can tell us anything, right?”

_ Could he really, though?  _

When Sirius didn’t say anything, Remus continued. “Remember when you guys found out I was a werewolf? You didn’t judge me, none of you did.” He paused. Sirius could see him smiling out of the corner of his eye. He loved Remus’s smile. “I remember being so worried you guys would turn your backs on me,” he continued with a soft chuckle. “But you didn’t. You all stuck with me, despite what I am. And we’ll do the same to you, Sirius. I don’t know if your situation is like mine, but it doesn’t matter. The point is, the Marauders stick together no matter what.” 

Remus looked quite proud of the little speech he’d just given, and Sirius couldn’t blame him. There was something about Remus’s words, and even just his presence that made Sirius feel better, stronger and much more confident.

Sirius looked at Remus, looked him directly in the eyes. “I think I’m-” He paused to cut himself off. “Well, actually it’s not something I think. It’s something I know, and I’ve known for a while now.”

“It’s okay, Sirius. You can tell me.”

Sirius closed his eyes, gathering up courage, then opened them again. “I’m gay,” he whispered. Then, he repeated the words, louder and with more confidence this time. “I’m gay.”

Remus didn’t react in anger or disgust, as Sirius had feared he would. He nodded, a soft smile spreading on his lips. “That’s cool. Thank you for telling me, Padfoot.”

“It doesn’t change anything?” Sirius questioned, suddenly feeling a little ridiculous for how nervous he’d been. 

“No!” Remus shook his head, pulling Sirius into a tight hug. “Of course it doesn’t change anything.” 

 

-

 

The sounds of cutlery against plates, as well as the casual chatter among students, could be heard throughout the Great Hall as everyone ate dinner. 

Now that Sirius knew he at least had Remus by his side, he wasn’t scared anymore. And he was ready to tell everyone: not just his friends, but everyone at Hogwarts. No more hiding who he really was. 

“‘Kay, I’m gonna do it now,” he muttered, putting down his fork.

“Do what?” James asked.

Sirius still hadn’t come out to him and Peter, but they were gonna find out now. And if Remus supported him, he was almost certain they would too. At least he hoped so…

He pushed his plate and goblet, as well as a pork dish, to the side before standing up on the table. “Listen up, fuckers!” he shouted, causing most of the chatter to die out and everyone’s faces to turn and look at him. 

He heard James whisper “what the hell is he doing?” to someone, probably Remus, and he half expected a teacher or someone to come and pull him down, but no one really did. That meant he had to go through with this.

“Is everyone listening?” he called out. “‘Cause I have something important to tell you.”

And when no one stopped him, he took in a deep breath, before shouting out the words for everyone to hear: “I’m gay! That’s right, everyone. I, Sirius Black, am a raging homosexual!”

There was a moment of deafening silence, where it seemed people were still taking in the words. Then, that silence was broken by someone clapping. Sirius looked down and saw it was James, who was quickly joined by Remus, Peter, and suddenly there were _loads_ of people clapping.

Not everyone, of course: some people looked disgusted, angry, and some just seemed to not really care.

But that was fine, Sirius thought as he gracefully bowed, a huge smile plastered on his face. He finally jumped down from the table, settling back down between his friends, who were, to his relief all smiling at him. 

“Mate, that was really brave of you!” James said, grinning as he put an arm around Sirius. “And I want you to know, I support you no matter what.”

Sirius smiled, looking at Peter who eagerly nodded in agreement with James. He really couldn’t care less if every single person in Hogwarts would hate him after this: as long as he had his friends by his side. 


	2. Remus: Realisation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woo, pride! *throws confetti everywhere*  
> Enjoy the chapter, friendos! :3

Remus stared into the mirror where his reflection, tired-looking and with a messy bedhead, stared back at him. He turned on the tap, bending down to the sink to splash water in his face. It didn’t make anything clearer or any more sensible to him.

After Sirius had come out, something had changed. It wasn’t that Remus, or any of the Marauders, had a problem with it. Not at all. And perhaps it wasn’t so much that it had changed, but rather that Remus now better understood how he felt about Sirius.

“Oh, you’re ridiculous,” he muttered, something he’d told himself so many times already.

Of course, he’d known for a long time, but it wasn’t before Sirius’s coming out that he’d actually realized what these feelings were.

“Come on,” he told himself, straightening up to look in the mirror again. “You’re _not_ _in love with him_. That can’t be what this is.”

“Remus? Mate, are you alright in there?”

Startled, Remus turned around, swearing under his breath. He’d forgotten he wasn’t alone but did, in fact, share this dorm with 3 other people. “Yeah, I’m fine, Sirius,” he called, praying to all that was good and holy that Sirius hadn’t heard him talk to himself.

“That’s great, but can you maybe hurry up?” Sirius replied, sounding mildly impatient. “I’d like to actually have time to get ready too!”

“Yeah, and you know Sirius takes _forever_ in the shower!” James called, probably from his bed.

Remus sighed. “Sorry, Pads, I’ll be quick.” He turned back to the mirror, making a quick attempt at making his hair look decent, before giving up just as quickly and exiting the bathroom.

Sirius was standing just outside the bathroom, waiting. Remus ducked his head, not wanting to look at Sirius. The past couple of days he’d found himself getting nervous and flustered whenever he looked at him.

Just as Remus passed him, Sirius grabbed his arm, causing him to stop in his tracks. “Remus, you’ve been strangely distant lately,” Sirius noted. Something in his voice made Remus look up, into Sirius’s eyes. They were wide, staring up at Remus with a strange nervousness. “It’s not because of what I told you guys… about me, is it?”

“What? No!” Remus shook his head, a feeling of guilt settling in his stomach. “Sirius, I’m sorry, _please_ don’t think that!”

Sirius let go of his arm, letting out a relieved sigh. “What is it then?” he asked. “You can’t deny you’ve been acting strange.”

Remus chewed on his lip, eyeing James and Peter who were sitting on each of their beds. It didn’t seem like they were listening to the conversation, but he really didn’t want anyone to overhear him. “Can we talk later?” he asked quietly, looking back at Sirius. “In private, perhaps?”

“Oh,” Sirius nodded, smiling. “Of course, Re. We can talk after class if you’d like.”

Remus gratefully returned the smile. “Yeah, thanks.” The two of them kept eye contact for a moment, an awkward silence forming between them. Remus cleared his throat, looking away. "I’ll, uh, let you use the bathroom now.”

 

-

 

“Hey, Moons, you wanted to talk about something, right?”

Remus had been on his way back to the common room after his last class that day, Herbology. He’d recognized Sirius’s footsteps behind him, further down the hallway and his heart had skipped a beat as he heard his friend speed up and run to catch up with him. Smiling softly, he turned to look at Sirius. “Yeah,” he answered. “Is now a good time, though? I mean, it can wait.”

Sirius shook his head, smiling brightly. “I’ve got all the time in the world. Perhaps we could go to the library. You wanted to talk privately, right? No one ever visits that dusty hole.” He laughed, that loud, bark-like laughter. It was so infectious, Remus couldn’t help but grin at his friend.

“I didn’t think you were aware Hogwarts even had a library,” he teased, taking a turn down the hallway towards the library.

As Sirius had predicted, the library was empty except for the grumpy old librarian, Madam Pince. Remus and Sirius sat down at a table in the back, careful not to be too loud, although that proved to be quite a challenge for Sirius.

“Alright, mate-” Sirius was interrupted by an angry Madam Pince who hushed him into silence. He rolled his eyes, but lowered his voice as he continued: “What is it you wanted to talk about?”

Remus chewed on his lip, looking over the dusty old books, although he had no interest in them. “How, uhm…” He paused for a moment, thinking about how to phrase his question. “How did you know you were gay?” he asked in a hushed voice.

Sirius looked a bit taken aback by the question, but only for a moment, before his surprised expression turned into a thoughtful one. “Well, I suppose I just… realized I like boys?”

Remus snorted. “Yeah, no shit.” He sighed, his mind lingering for a moment on the question of whether Sirius liked any specific boy, but he quickly pushed the thought away. “But have you ever, uh… I mean, do you like girls too?”

Sirius stared at him for a moment, then threw his head back and laughed. “Remus, mate, that’s not how being gay works,” he said. “Anyways, why are you asking?”

“Just curious,” Remus muttered, staring down at the table.

That wasn’t exactly the reason, but he wasn’t going to tell Sirius the truth, at least not yet. He wasn’t going to tell him that he had, for a moment thought he was gay too, but now wasn’t so sure. He wasn’t gonna tell him that he liked boys and girls. Was that even possible?

“Well, nice talk,” Remus said, chuckling. “You don’t have to stay anymore in this dusty old library.”

Although Remus was trying to look anywhere but at Sirius, he could feel his friend's eyes on him. “Remus, you were so kind and supportive to me when I was trying to come out,” Sirius said, his voice soft and a lot more serious than it usually was. “I really appreciate that and, uhm… If there’s anything you wanna tell me, you know I’m here for you too.” And with those words, he got up and left the library.

Remus decided to stay for a moment, once again letting his eyes wander over the many shelves of books until, suddenly, an especially colourful book caught his eye. He got up and walked to the bookshelf to take a closer look. Most of the books in the library were dusty, brown, quite unremarkable, really, so this book, with the colours of the whole rainbow, really stood out.

Remus pulled it out and looked at the front cover. The title read: ‘Human sexuality: complex and magical’

“Huh.” Remus stood for a moment, just looking at the books colourful cover. Of course, he had no idea if this book was going to be any help at all, but there was the possibility that it had the answers he needed.

“What are you standing around for like that, huh?” Remus jumped at the angry voice of Madam Pince, who had somehow managed to sneak up behind him completely unnoticed. “You best not be looking to cause trouble!”

Remus shook his head, quickly hiding the book under his sweater. “No, not at all,” he said, with a strange feeling of guilt even though he was telling the truth. “I was just looking at books, but I’ll leave now.”

Madam Pince glared at him but didn’t say anything as he quickly left the library.

 

-

 

Once Remus was back in the Gryffindor common room, he found a secluded spot in the corner and got out the book: ‘Human sexuality’.

He opened it on the first page and quickly skimmed the author’s note, in which the author told his own story of coming to terms with his sexuality. It was interesting, Remus thought, but he could read it later.

He flipped the page and found exactly what he hadn't known he was looking for: On page 3, 4, and possibly even the pages after that, was a list, and it didn’t take more than a quick scan for Remus to realize it was a list of different sexualities.

“I didn’t know there were more than two,” he muttered to himself as he began to read.

The first one on the list was straight. He didn’t bother reading it. Next, gay. He knew that too, but these were really the only ones he had known till now. He moved onto the next point on the list, then stopped, went over it and read it again.

_Bisexual: Someone who is bisexual does not only experience attraction to one gender but is attracted to both men and women._

“Oh,” he whispered, letting out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. “So that’s what I am.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Comments and kudos are what fuels my soul so feel free to leave some of those! <3


	3. James: Spin the Bottle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahhh shit guys! i meant to finish this whole thing in pride month but... well, now it's august so i clearly failed.  
> anyway, i strongly believe in the philosophy that every month should be pride month, so we'll pretend this was intentional xD
> 
> hope y'all enjoy this chapter!

One thing was for sure: The Gryffindors, and especially the Marauders, knew how to party. 

The after-game parties were James’ favourites, especially when he was the one holding the Quidditch trophy. And today he was.

The Gryffindor common room was packed with students from all houses. A lot of Hufflepuffs had shown up, apparently in good spirit despite being beaten in Quidditch, and James even thought he saw some Slytherins as well. 

“Oi, James!” Sirius ran up to him, a bottle of half-empty firewhiskey in his hand. “We’re playing a game, come on!”

James grinned, setting aside the trophy and following Sirius to the other end of the Common Room where a bunch of people were gathered around: Remus, Peter, Marlene and Dorcas, as well as some Ravenclaws and, to James’s surprise, Sirius’ brother. 

“Alright.” Sirius sat down next to Peter, leaving enough space for James to squeeze in between them. “What are we gonna play?”

“How about Spin the Bottle?” Marlene suggested.

James had no idea what Spin the Bottle was, and by the look of everyone's faces, it seemed he wasn’t the only one. 

“Alright, let me explain how the game works,” Marlene said. She chugged the last contents of the bottle she had been holding, before placing it in front of the group. “Basically, I spin the bottle-” she said, illustrating the spinning emotion with her hand, “And whoever it points at when it stops spinning has to kiss me. Understood?” She looked around, an expectant look in her piercing blue eyes.

“Sure, let’s do it,” Sirius said. “Wanna start?” he asked, looking at Marlene. 

She spun the bottle; not particularly hard. It only went around one time before stopping, pointing at Dorcas. 

“Oh.” Dorcas’ face went bright red as she bit her lip and peered at Marlene through her hair. “Well, uhm, I guess that’s fine, right? No big deal.”

“Right.” Marlene looked like she was trying to contain a smile, as she gently placed a hand on her friend's cheek and leaned in to kiss her.

After that, everyone took turns to spin the bottle, while also getting more and more drunk. Dorcas and Peter shared a quick peck that neither of them seemed to enjoy. Peter and Remus shared an equally quick uncomfortable kiss, and so did Remus and Marlene. The funniest moment was probably after Sirius and Marlene kissed: 

“Damn, McKinnon. If I wasn’t gay before, I certainly am now,” Sirius teased the blonde, who proceeded to throw her drink at him. 

“You were pretty shit too, Black,” she teased back. “I’d choose Dorcas over you any day.”

 

The game went on: lots of spinning and kissing and drinking. James hadn’t had that much to drink, but it never took a lot for him to get drunk. The room was already starting to spin just a little.

“Reg, it’s your turn to spin the bottle,” Sirius said, handing the bottle to his brother, who just scoffed, placing the bottle back on the floor with very little enthusiasm.

“Do I have to?”

“Yeah!” Sirius insisted. “Why are you here, anyway if you don’t wanna play?”

“Out of boredom,” the younger brother mumbled, angrily spinning the bottle. It was a pretty poor spin: the bottle didn’t even make it one round before coming to a stop. 

It took James a moment to register that it was pointing to himself. “Oh.” He laughed, turning to Regulus. “Let’s get this over with, shall we?”

Regulus didn’t seem too happy about it but finally he, very reluctantly, leaned forwards, pressing his lips again’s James’. 

_ Holy fucking shit.  _

James didn’t know what he had expected from the kiss but it sure as hell wasn’t this: as their lips touched, time stopped and everything disappeared: it was just him and regulus and the fireworks exploding in his chest. 

Then it ended: Regulus broke away, quickly making sure to put as much distance between James and himself as possible. 

Sirius laughed. “Well, that was awkward,” he said. “Anyway, James, it’s your turn to spin the bottle.”

James suddenly felt strangely dizzy and lightheaded. “Actually, I think I’m gonna call it a day,” he said and, making sure to look anywhere but at Regulus, he got to his feet, holding onto a piece of furniture for balance.

“Really?” Sirius sounded both disappointed and concerned. “But it’s so early.”

“I know,” James mumbled. “But I’m tired.”

Remus looked at him with narrowed eyes. “James, are you okay?” he asked.

“Yes, I’m just tired from the quidditch game, okay?” he answered, his tone sharper and more defensive than he’d meant for it to be. 

After that, his friends stayed quiet as he stumbled through the crowd and up the staircase to the dorms. 

 

-

 

The first thing James noticed when he woke up was the pounding, throbbing headache, only made worse by the muffled voices of his friends. 

Slowly, he opened his eyes, then immediately regretted it: an intensely bright ray of light, which he assumed could only be the sun, hit his eyes, causing him to temporarily go blind. Wincing, he looked away as he quietly swore under his breath. 

The noise seemed to catch the attention of his friends, who stopped talking for a moment.

“Well, look who’s up!” Sirius laughed as he drew back the curtain to James’ bed, letting in even more light.

Again, James winced, as he slowly sat up in bed. “Why is everything so bright?” he asked, voice groggy and heavier than usual.

“Oh, that would be the sun,” Remus answered, in that sarcastic tone which James usually liked. It wasn’t very helpful right now, though. 

“Mate, you look like shit,” Sirius noted, a hint of concern in his otherwise cheerful tone. “Did you really get that drunk last night?”   
James didn’t recall having drunk too much, at least not more than everyone else. But then again, he certainly did have a lower tolerance to alcohol than most of the others, so maybe he should've been more careful. It’s just that careful really wasn’t his style. 

“Do you even remember what happened last night?” Remus asked with a soft chuckle, handing James his glasses. 

Oh yeah, James remembered. He remembered the quidditch game which they had won, thanks to him, and he remembered the party that was thrown afterwards and the triumph he felt when holding the trophy. He had felt like a real hero; confident, invincible. He remembered the game of spin the bottle, a game that had been fun and harmless _until_. 

Until he had kissed Regulus Black. 

James didn’t understand. Was kissing a boy supposed to feel that way? Surely not, unless he was gay. But he couldn’t be, could he?

He liked Lily. Or was that just some lie he had told himself because he didn’t wanna admit that he liked boys?

“James?” 

A hand on his shoulder brought James back to reality. He looked up at Remus, who looked torn between concern and amusement. 

“Is everything… okay?” The werewolf asked, eyeing him suspiciously.

James nodded, perhaps a little too much: the movement caused another painful throb to go through his head. “Yeah, I’m fine,” he muttered. One slow movement at a time, he got up from the bed. For a moment the room spun around him, threatening to send him lying down again, but the feeling quickly disappeared. “Shit, I guess I’m pretty hungover, huh?” he mumbled. “I’ll go splash some water in my face. See you at breakfast.”

“Sure.” Sirius nodded, clearly not entirely convinced. “In the meantime, we’ll go wake Peter.”

 

-

 

James exited the bathroom feeling slightly better. Physically, at least. He still couldn’t quite shake the weird thought - the doubt he was feeling, all because of that stupid kiss. 

He found all three of the boys still waiting for him by the door. 

“What are you guys doing here?” he asked. “I said I’d see you at breakfast!”

Remus sighed. “Yeah, mate, we know;” he said. “It’s just…”

He seemed to trail off, so Sirius continued for him. “You’re acting really weird, Prongs,” he said. “You have been since yesterday.”

“What?” James plastered on a smile, but it didn’t exactly feel genuine. “I’m not acting weird.”

Remus snorted. “Yeah, you are,” he said, shaking his head. “You're usually the most annoying one of the group. Along with Sirius.”

“Yeah, we’ve known you for, like, 6 years, mate,” Sirius noted, seemingly ignoring Remus' last comment. “We can tell us when something is up.”

James sighed, leaning against the wall. “I swear, nothing is wrong,” he said. “I just have a bit of a hangover, that’s all.” He felt bad lying to his friends, but he knew he couldn’t tell them the truth. Of course, they wouldn’t have a problem with him possibly fancying a boy, but that’s the thing: he liked Lily. He had liked her since 3rd year, he was almost sure of that, and Lily was a girl, so how could he like boys too? It didn’t make sense to him, so surely it wouldn’t make sense to them either, and they would probably either think he was crazy or lying for attention. 

Sirius sighed, looking defeated. “Alright, mate,” he said. “See you at breakfast.”

Peter nodded, looking back for a moment before following Sirius out the door. James sighed in relief, waiting for Remus to leave too. But Remus didn’t leave. He just leaned against the wall, crossing his arms as he looked at James, his green eyes surprisingly intimidating. 

James kind of wanted to do the same, just stare at Remus until he left, but something told him Remus wasn’t going to leave. 

“James, why are you acting so fucking weird?” he asked.

James sighed, and sat down at the edge of his bed, face resting in his hands. Maybe he should tell Remus. He wasn’t sure what his friend would think about any of it, but if anyone would have any helpful insights, it was probably the always-so-clever werewolf. 

“Remus, I’m so confused,” James mumbled, voice muffled by his hands. “I thought I knew who I was and what I wanted, but now... now I just don’t know.”

Remus was quiet for a moment, probably thinking. “Is this because of something that happened last night?” he asked. “Your mood seemed to change really suddenly.”

James looked up at Remus, and suddenly, it was like something in him snapped: quickly, almost frantically, he told Remus about everything: How incredible it had felt to kiss Regulus, how he didn’t know if he really fancied boys because he had felt so sure about his feelings for Lily. 

“What if I don’t actually like Lily?” he asked, voice filled with distressed. “What if that’s a lie I told myself because I didn’t want to admit that I’m gay?” Without giving Remus any chance to speak, he continued: “But… It doesn’t feel like a lie. My feelings for Lily, I mean. Whenever I’m near her I get butterflies in my stomach and I can’t help but act like an idiot. Some days I can’t stop thinking about her: her beautiful red hair that smell like summer, her vibrant, green eyes…” He trailed off, for a moment just looking into the distance. “So,” he continued. “Maybe it’s my feelings for guys, or at least Regulus, that are a lie. Maybe I just got worked up cause it was my first kiss.”

He finally stopped talking, and looked at Remus, expecting him to say something like “you’re right, you’re probably just confused” or “wow, you’re crazy”, but he didn’t say any of that. James couldn’t quite read his expression: he looked surprised, taken aback but it was impossible to know what he was thinking. 

“But, James,” he said, his surprised face turning into a smile. “Why does either of it have to be a lie?”

It was James’ turn to looked surprised. “What do you mean?” he asked.

Instead of answering, Remus walked over to his trunk and pulled out a brightly coloured book, then sat down beside James. 

“This book really helped me,” he said, showing James the cover. It was titled ‘Human sexuality’. “Maybe it’ll help you too.”

Remus opened the book and flipped a few pages. “James, do you think you might be bisexual?”

“Bisexual?” James had never heard that word before.

“Here,” Remus handed him the books, then pointed to a line on the page. 

James read it carefully:

_ Bisexual: Someone who is bisexual does not only experience attraction to one gender but is attracted to both men and women. _

“Wait, really?” He looked up at Remus, relief already washing away some of the stress he’d been feeling. “I didn’t know that was a thing!”

Remus chuckled, carefully closing the book again. “I know,” he said. “Me neither.” 

“How did you find this book?” James asked. “Like, why did you look for it?”

“Because…” Remus took a deep breath before looking up at James. “I’m bisexual, too.”

“Really?” Now that James thought about it, that made a lot of sense. The way Remus stared longingly after Sirius when he thought no one was looking made it pretty clear he wasn’t straight. “How long have you known?” he asked.

Remus shrugged and looked down at the book, a smile tugging at his lips. “Well, I only found this book, like, 4 days ago,” he said. “But I think deep down I’ve known for a while. Even if I didn’t have a word for it.”

James nodded, his face suddenly splitting into a big grin. “Fuck, Remus, you have no idea how amazing it is to know that I’m not alone or a freak,” he said.

“Well-” Remus smiled, nudging him with his arm. “I’d say I have a pretty good idea of what that’s like.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks, again, to everyone for reading this fic. kudos and comments make me really happy and lets me know if y'all liked it :3  
> follow me on tumblr! @whom-ping-willow

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for checking out this fic! It would mean so much to me if you would leave kudos and a comment c:


End file.
